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Satisfaction with a fight scene…

Published April 9, 2015 by S. E. Myers

There is something satisfying about sitting here and seeing my character kick some evil butt. However, it is extremely exhausting. By the end of the fight I feel as if I need to take a break. Andie limps away nursing her wounds and the other character is usually dead and/or apprehended.

When writing these scenes, I think of Jet Li or Jason Statham. I’m a fan of both and watching their movies (yes I realize the fight scenes are choreographed) gives me a little insight into how I need to frame the fight. Fast, Furious, little dialogue. Let’s be honest, who in their right mind will stop to speak a whole paragraph in the midst of fighting someone.

I was just thinking and wanted to take a break from my own fight scene and share.


Bones and more bones…

Published November 13, 2014 by S. E. Myers

A couple of things…

Throughout this weight loss process, I have forgotten what my body felt like before the fat (BTF.) BTF, I was thin. I weight 126 with my 5’2″ frame. The last time I weighed less than 200 pounds, was 20 years ago.

Now the pounds are shedding and I am feeling bones in places I forgot I had bones before. Namely, my shoulder area. It’s weird. I scratched my shoulder to my shoulder blade and rested my hand for a moment, grasping my shoulder. Rotating my cuff, I realized I could feel the bones shifting beneath my skin. It is a weird experience.

This is similar to the experience I had while resting my chin in my hand. Amazingly, there was a chin bone that actually jutted out from my face. It was odd. I hadn’t experienced this situation in a very long time. Usually, there was an extra chin layer and I didn’t feel bone. But I never realized that i didn’t feel it.

I get pretty embarrassed when people tell me that I am getting “skinny.” I’ve never thought myself skinny, even when I was. But, yesterday while working out. One of the gals I work with and haven’t seen since the beginning of October talked to me for a second while I was working my butt off on the elliptical and sweating buckets. She paid me a compliment and stated that I have really gotten “skinnier.” Instead of shrugging her off and becoming embarrassed, saying that I have “more” to go, I said “Thank you.”

Being gracious is hard. Accepting that I am changing is hard also. This is definitely a learning experience.


It’s all in the preparation

Published October 27, 2014 by S. E. Myers

Preparing this next novel has been a lot tougher than I originally thought it would be. Whenever I just want to write, something else pops up that is needed with the family or kids. I wish I could just stay home and make that my permanent job. I’d have plenty of time then I think, but, knowing me and how much I love procrastination… well, I am sure you can see how that will play out.

I finally got to see my precious grandbaby. He is amazing.


Kathryn and Marshall

With Autumn here and the leaves changing, I’ve been thinking about change for myself. More like finding more motivation to complete another book. With a husband who has more faith in me than I deserve, I need to finish something. I feel as if I need to make him proud of me. He would give me the time and space I need in order to do it. I need noise cancelling headphones to jam to my music as I write. And of course, there is the walking around bit that I do.

Weird writer habits! Post-it notes galore!

Down and counting…

Published October 13, 2014 by S. E. Myers

Well, 57 pounds and only 100 more to go. I’m down to a size 18 and should be a 16 in the next two weeks. This week I start core training. It’s absolutely crazy how fast your body gets used to cardio. I’ve been doing the elliptical and although I use the fat burner workout that increases the resistance, your body still gets used to it. It’s pretty awesome that I can now wear pants that I have kept for the past 10 years – that still have the tags on…yes, the tags. I bought them thinking they would fit – and they didn’t. Of course they didn’t because I was in denial. HUGE denial. My brain is doing this weird catch up thing. I look in the mirror and can still see how I looked 3 months ago. Other people can see the more slimmer version now. Even Sunday I received some amazing compliments. This week will be difficult because of the hit-n-run we were involved in. I have a chiro appointment because my neck and shoulder are still damaged. Hurts to even lift my arm so training will be focused on belly and legs today. Trying to get my book done. Andi is an amazing character and I wish I could be a strong as she is. The pain and suffering she has had endure has been absolutely torturous. Let’s see… Life is just busy! Kids to seminary, work, gym, home, dinner, Mutual, writing, gaming, family, kids school, parent hours… and the list goes on.

The hardest thing…

Published August 24, 2014 by S. E. Myers

It is hard to let go, however, it is something that I will have to do. 10 months ago I had to ask my daughter and her fiance’ to move out of my home.  She constantly treated me terribly, disrespected me, and used her blog to say horrible things.  Here is her previous blog, just look at the archives from October through November of 2013 – http://lifewithjoeandmarshall.tumblr.com. But, apparently, I’m the one that is delusional.

After her latest post – http://marshallsmomma.tumblr.com entitle “Mother,” I’m done. I read her blog to see pictures of my grandson. I messaged her husband Joe because I want to see my grandson and to let them know that no matter what, they are family and if they needed a place, they wouldn’t be turned away. As a matter of fact, AFTER they moved if they would have EVER come and said that they wanted to move back in I would have let them. But they didn’t believe I would follow through with it according to one of her tumblr posts.

So, I am washing my hands. I am done. Everyone says she will come around but I can’t wait for that anymore. It hurts too much. She believes that everyone else put thoughts into my head but what she forgets is that her and I have had problems for a long time with the way she treated me and  the way she talked to Kathryn.

She never told me that Joe’s unemployment was running out, she never talked to me about “grown-up” things or really talked to me. She gave me attitude. Joe was the middle-man. He was the one that would diffuse the situation when we argued. I respected him for that.

The problem with lies is that the story continually changes. Her story does. She believes that Joe gave me a crap ton of money, he did not. She holds the car accident we were in over my head and believes that the money Joe got from the accident he gave all to me. He didn’t.  Does she realize that because Joe claimed  bodily injury I got more points deducted from my driver’s license? Also, I glanced at HER when the other car in front of me slammed on their breaks. Whatever. An accident is an accident plain and simple. It happens, get over it. I love her phrase “accident that YOU caused” – really? Like it was 3 car pile up and I was driving recklessly. No, I rear ended someone because 2 cars ahead an idiot decided last minute not to go through a light and I was already slowing down.

She forgets that I spent over a grand on her baby shower and I took care of her throughout her pregnancy. I forgave her when she dropped out of school after she didn’t pass the last block and had only the one left. When I was unemployed, I took her to and from that damn school. It ticked me off. She lived with me and didn’t get a job, didn’t go to school but I was her mother and instead of helping her, I enabled her. I should have kicked her out after she dropped out of school.

Aside from all this, I still have my youngest daughter at home and my son who lives with his dad. Illeana has harbored resentment toward her younger sister because she believes she never got into trouble. Not true. But she is going to believe whatever she wants to.

She was asked to moved out because I was done. I brought home Popeye’s chicken and didn’t get her text about boneless chicken. Kathryn was with us in the car and asked for chicken strips and so I got her some. I get home and all of a sudden Illeana flips out about chicken. Seriously. She  became unglued. It wasn’t the first time. She claims this is not the truth. That I had an ulterior motive that included in my husband and his children. She even posted this on a gofundme webpage because her and her husband were having financial problems. Maybe they should have saved more money and not gotten tattoos, I mean, that is the adult thing to do…put your needs last. I always put my needs last.

Yes, I knew my husband 3 months before we were married, but you know what…I  am 40 freaking years old. I knew what I wanted and when you know you know. We are happy and still in love and it has been amazing. He is amazing. ONE argument.  One. That is how many we have had.  Our marriage is healthy,  happy and thriving. Our children get along and love each other. Our household is filled with laughter and the occasional children squabble, but it is amazing.

I don’t know when she will allow me to see my grandson, but, I can’t think about that. I miss him and I love him. The day he was born was one of the best days of my life, aside from the birth of my own children and my wedding day. But, she also says I ruined for her because he had to be born on my schedule. Her doctor is the one that induced her. I didn’t make that decision.

She is going to point  blame in my direction for everything she has had to go through. She brought it all on herself. Maybe if she had apologized instead of continuing to perpetuate things, it would have been different. But she didn’t, she won’t and until she takes part of the blame upon herself, things won’t change.

I think that one of the most irritating things is her claim that I put her on the back burner, or rather her and her sister. She was 20 at the time. Really? Was she still supposed to be one of my children I had to take care of, or could she start being an adult already?

She’s my daughter and I will always love her, but for now, I have to let her go and move on.

Another Saturday…

Published August 2, 2014 by S. E. Myers

This is my next to last Saturday before I go back to work.  The recovery process has been slow and having fibromyalgia made it more drawn out.  The nurses at the hospital even warned me that it takes longer because of the nerve sensors and their overreaction. 

I’ve been contemplating why I sit at a computer screen and no words come forward.  I am not quite sure what is going on.  I see what I want to write, but  the translation becomes lost.  I think it is fear.  My husband keeps telling me that I am talented.  It isn’t that I don’t believe him, I just feel that I am not as talented as he thinks I am. 

I have vast room for improvement.  I need to finish my book.  I have been trying to write everyday even if it is a few hundred words.  At least it is something, right?


Published July 27, 2014 by S. E. Myers

I am not quite sure how to let go.  My daughter is still angry that I made her move out and has fabricated a story as to why.  She takes no responsibility and won’t allow me to see my grandson either.  I think it is time to let her go because all I do is dwell on it and it is toxic.  My friends tell me that one day she will get over it, but honestly, it is going to be too late by then. 

Now instead of me, she is talking slanderously about her supposed best friend.  I can’t believe I raised a child to be so ungrateful, selfish and mean.